since i've done just about everything else i decided to put up some lightbulb jokes.  here goes:

How many jugglers does it take to change a lightbulb ?
- Only one, but it takes at least three lightbulbs.

How many football players does it take to screw in a lightbulb ?
- An entire team, and they all get a semesters credit for it.

How many doctors does it take to screw in a lightbulb ?
- It depends on whather it has medical insurance.

How many fatalists does it take to screw in a lightbulb ?
- It doesn't matter, We're all going to die anyway.

How many cops does it take to screw n a lightbulb ?
- None. It turned itself in

How many automechanics does it take to screw in a lightbulb ?
- Five. One to force it with a hammer, and four to go out for more lightbulbs.

How many bankers does it take to screw in a lightbulb ?
- Four. One to hold the bulb, and three to try and remember the combination.

How many Technical Support folks does it take to change a lightbulb ?
- We have an exact copy of the bulb here, and it appears to work fine. Can You tell me what kind af system You have ? Okay, exactly how dark is it ? Okay, there could be four or five things wrong.... Have You tried the light switch ???

How many Bill Clintons does it take to change a lightbulb ?
- None. He'll only promise change.

How many computer engineers does it take to change a lightbulb ?
- Why bother. The socket will be obsolete in six months anyway.

How many librarians does it take to change a lightbulb ?
- I don't know, but I could look it up for You.

How many Psychologists does it take to change a lightbulb ?
- Just one. But the bulb has to really WANT to change.

How many fishermen does it take to change a lightbulb ?
- Five. And You should have seen the bulb, it must have been THIS big.

here are some dumb quotes that i found on the internet

"Sure there have been injuries and deaths in boxing - but none of them serious."
- Alan Minter, Boxer

"During the scrimmage, Tarkanian paced the sideline with his hands in his pockets while biting his nails."
- AP report describing Fresno State basketball coach Jerry Tarkanian

"You guys line up alphabetically by height."
- Bill Peterson, Florida State football coach

"Men, I want you just thinking of one word all season. One word and one word only: Super Bowl."
- Bill Peterson, football coach

"Most cars on our roads have only one occupant, usually the driver."
- Carol Malia, BBC Anchorwoman

"China is a big country, inhabited by many Chinese."
- Charles De Gaulle, former French President

"Most lies about blondes are false."
- Cincinnati Times-Star, headline

"It is wonderful to be here in the great state of Chicago"
- Dan Quayle, former U.S. Vice-President

"I love California, I practically grew up in Phoenix."
- Dan Quayle, former U.S. Vice President

"We're just physically not physical enough."
- Denny Crum, Louisville basketball coach

"The doctors X-rayed my head and found nothing."
- Dizzy Dean explaining how he felt after being hit on the head by a ball in the 1934 World Series

"Can you get a ticket for running a stop sign that is not
there?"
- Driver school applicant

"Boxing’s all about getting the job done as quickly as possible, whether it takes 10 or 15 or 20 rounds."
- Frank Bruno, Boxer

"The streets are safe in Philadelphia. It's only the people who make them unsafe."
- Frank Rizzo, ex-police chief and mayor of Philadelphia.

since you liked the dumb laws so much here are some more.  California has some of the dumbest laws and the longest list of them.

California Crazy Law

·  Sunshine is guaranteed to the masses.

·  Animals are banned from mating publicly within 1,500 feet of a tavern, school, or place of worship.

Looking for more dumb laws? Check out DumbLaws.com!

·  Many animals are illegal to own as pets, including snails, sloths, and elephants.

·  Bathhouses are against the law.

·  In an animal shelter, lizards and snakes are treated under the same guidelines as cats and dogs.

·  No vehicle without a driver may exceed 60 miles per hour.

·  Women may not drive in a house coat.

·  It is a misdemeanor to shoot at any kind of game from a moving vehicle, unless the target is a whale.

Arcadia

·  Peacocks have the right of way to cross any street, including driveways.

Alhambra

·  You cannot leave your car on the street overnight without the proper permit.

Baldwin Park

·  Nobody is allowed to ride a bicycle in a swimming pool.

Belvedere

·  City Council order reads: "No dog shall be in a public place without its master on a leash."

Blythe

·  You are not permitted to wear cowboy boots unless you already own at least two cows.

Burlingame

·  It is illegal to spit, except on baseball diamonds.

Carmel

·  Ice cream may not be eaten while standing on the sidewalk. (Repealed when Clint Eastwood was mayor)

·  Women may not wear high heels while in the city limits.

Downey

·  It is illegal to wash your car in the street. (Passed 1995).

Hollywood

·  It is illegal to drive more than two thousand sheep down Hollywood Boulevard at one time.

Lafayette

·  You are forbidden to spit on the ground within 5 feet of another person.

Lodi

·  It is illegal to own or sell "Silly String".

Lompoc

·  It is illegal to posses, own or raise roosters. This is considered disturbing the peace.

Long Beach

·  It is illegal to curse on a mini-golf course.

·  Cars are the only item allowed in a garage.

Los Angeles

·  Toads may not be licked.

·  You may not hunt moths under a street light.

·  You cannot bathe two babies in the same tub at the same time.

·  Zoot suits are prohibited.

·  It is illegal to cry on the witness stand.

·  It is illegal for a man to beat his wife with a strap wider than 2 inches without her consent.

Ontario

·  Roosters may not crow in the city limits.

Palm Springs

·  It is illegal to walk a camel down Palm Canyon Drive between the hours of four and six PM.

Pasadena

·  It is illegal for a secretary to be alone in a room with her boss.

Prunedale

·  Two bathtubs may not be installed in the same house.

Redlands

·  Motor vehicles may not drive on city streets unless a man with a lantern is walking ahead of it.

Riverside

·  One may not carry a lunch down the street between 11 and 1 o'clock.

San Diego

·  The owners of houses with Christmas lights on them past February second may be fined up to $250.

·  It is illegal to shoot jackrabbits from the back of a streetcar.

San Francisco

·  Persons classified as "ugly" may not walk down any street.

·  Prohibits elephants from strolling down Market Street unless they are on a leash.

·  It is illegal to pile horse manure more than six feet high on a street corner.

·  It is illegal to wipe one's car with used underwear.

these always keep rachel entertained so i thought you might like them. 

Q: What is the blonde doing when she holds her hands tightly over her ears?

A: Trying to hold on to a thought

Q: how do you get a one-armed blonde out of a tree?

A: wave to her

Q: How did the blonde break her leg raking leaves?

A: she fell out of the tree

since you guys liked the other one so much here are some more dumb laws.  ENJOY!

Indiana Crazy Law

·  One man may not back into a parking spot becasue it prevents police officers from seeing the license plate.

·  Baths may not be taken between the months of October and March.

·  All males 18 to 50 years old must work six days a year on public roads.

·  Mustaches are illegal if the bearer has a tendency to habitually kiss other humans.

·  Hotel sheets must be exactly 99 inches long and 81 inches wide.

·  State government officials who engage in private duels can be dismissed from their post.

·  Drinking from your own bottle in a bar can lead to your arrest.

·  A man over the age of 18 may be arrested for statutory rape if the passenger in his car is not wearing her socks and shoes, and is under the age of 17.

·  It is illegal to sell cars on Sunday.

·  Drinks on the house are illegal.

·  It is illegal for a liquor store to sell cold soft drinks.

·  A person who dyes, stains, or otherwise alters the natural coloring of a bird or rabbit commits a Class B misdemeanor. (Ind. Code 15-2.1-21-13(b)

·  Smoking in the state legislature building is banned, except when the legislature is in session.

·  Liquor stores may not sell milk.